In the February newsletter, Steve reintroduces The Double-Fisted Gospel, an article written more than twenty-five years ago that speaks with renewed urgency today. As Lent begins, he examines the growing absence of men from the Church and the spiritual cost to families. Drawing on research, Scripture, and Catholic wisdom, Steve argues that men are not drawn back by a softened message, but by the full Gospel—one that holds together God’s mercy, the fear of the Lord, and a clear call to repentance and conversion.
From the Desk of Steve Wood at the Family Life Center (February 2026)
An Encore Article—As Urgent Today as When It Was Written
More than twenty-five years ago, I wrote an article that struck a nerve with Catholic men across the country. Titled The Double-Fisted Gospel: A Remedy for Absent Male Catholics, it quickly became one of the most widely shared newsletters in Family Life Center’s history.
We are resharing this article now—not because it is dated, but because it is needed.
The crisis it addresses has only intensified. Fewer men attend Mass. Fewer fathers lead their families in the Faith. And too many sons are growing up without a compelling call to repentance, holiness, and courage.
As we enter the season of Lent—a time given by the Church for repentance and return to the Father—I believe this message deserves to be heard again. Lent does not call us to vague reassurance, but to conversion.
What follows is the original article, lightly edited for length and clarity, while intentionally preserving its substance, tone, and challenge. Its message remains as bracing—and as necessary—as ever.
The Double-Fisted Gospel: A Remedy for Absent Male Catholics
Why are so many Catholic men absent from the Church?
- In the 1990s, men were dramatically underrepresented in church life. Today, there’s a surge among young men occurring in places where they are challenged, such as Traditional Latin Masses, non-progressive parishes, Orthodox Churches, and where the influence of Charlie Kirk was felt.1
- Research consistently shows that most unchurched men were once churched, pointing to loss over time rather than lack of exposure.2
- In Ireland, weekly Mass attendance has fallen to a small minority of Catholics, with men particularly absent in urban centers.3
- Across Western countries, women still carry the bulk of religious formation in the home, while many fathers remain spiritually disengaged.4
The common reply is that men just aren’t as religious as women. Then why is there no record of a difference in piety between men and women in the early centuries of the Church? And why are there more men than women in synagogues and mosques today?5
The absence of men from Catholic Churches is a crisis few seem willing to publicly acknowledge. Perhaps it is so large and seemingly hopeless that it is ignored. For the good of the Faith and the family, we must ask and answer two hard questions:
Why have men left the Church? And how can they be brought back?
It is too simplistic to attribute the absence of men to a single cause. Like any massive cultural or ecclesial phenomenon, several streams contribute to the current. Nevertheless, Irish researchers F. John Herriott and Joseph Foyle uncovered one significant cause by directly interviewing Catholic men who had stopped practicing their faith.
In a nutshell, Absent Male Catholics (AMC) reported that they had nothing to fear from God for violating His commandments, such as Sunday Mass attendance or the Church’s teaching on sexuality. They were falsely confident that they were going to heaven regardless of how they lived.
Single-Fisted Preaching
Herriott and Foyle traced the root cause of AMC to what they called single-fisted preaching. For decades, Catholics have often heard preaching that emphasizes the love, mercy, and forgiveness of God while excluding the fear of God, the justice of God, and the demanding holiness of God. Heaven is discussed openly, while Hell and Purgatory are scarcely mentioned.
John Cardinal Newman warned against such one-sided presentations of the Faith, writing:
“One aspect of Revelation must not be allowed to exclude or to obscure another; and Christianity is dogmatical, devotional, practical all at once; it is indulgent and strict; it is love and it is fear.”
The Double-Fisted Gospel—The Cure
Herriott and Foyle observed that the secular world understands how to motivate men using both gain and pain. Coaches, military leaders, and employers know that men do not reach their potential through rewards alone. Yet the Church has often relied on a gain-only approach.
This single-fisted gospel has contributed to a hemorrhaging of men from the Church.
John Crosby, Chairman of the Department of Philosophy at Franciscan University of Steubenville, warned:
“Are we not preparing for a violent rejection of the Faith by men who yearn for something real, when we embody only languid benevolence? Serious men cannot believe in a God reminiscent of a benevolent old grandfather.”6
Men Require a “Kick in the Pants”
I’ll never forget a community breakfast I attended several years ago in a small town in southwest Florida. The current Chief of Police was there in uniform to present a gold chief’s badge to a former chief, and before doing so, he shared a story to illustrate the practical wisdom of the man he was honoring.
A couple of teenage boys had been caught drinking beer and drag-racing on the runway of the town’s small airport. Today, such boys might be sent off for counseling or self-esteem therapy. But the former chief knew the boys personally. He didn’t want them saddled with arrest records—but he did want them to straighten up.
So he turned them around, gave each of them a swift kick in the rear, and told them in no uncertain terms to hightail it home. Which they promptly did.
As the current chief finished the story and presented the badge, he paused and said—with emotion in his voice—“I was one of those boys.”
Most men occasionally need a wake-up call. In church life, this comes through preaching repentance—the neglected first fist of the double-fisted gospel.
Men need to hear plainly that certain sins are wrong: adultery, pornography, contraception, willfully skipping Mass, drunkenness, unforgiveness, and worship of mammon. They need to be warned that refusal to repent can lead to the loss of their souls and the destruction of their families.
They need direct exhortations like the prophet Jeremiah’s: “Turn now every one of you from his evil way, and amend your doings.” (Jer. 35:15)
Some object that speaking this way will drive men away. More than half have already left. The single-fisted gospel is one of the chief reasons they give. While some may leave when the full Gospel is preached, many others will return.
Fear of God and the Fatherhood of God
The fear of the Lord is not servile fear—the cringing fear of a slave—but filial fear: reverential awe before the holiness of God. This fear is a gift of the Holy Spirit and a foundation of spiritual life.
Scripture teaches that even Jesus lived His earthly life with godly fear (Heb. 5:7). The early Church flourished when believers walked “in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit.” (Acts 9:31)
Today, Catholic families desperately need this balance restored. Fathers, in particular, must recover and teach the fear of the Lord if future generations are to remain in the Faith.
The Beginning of Renewal
The fear of the Lord is not the pinnacle of the spiritual life, but it is the necessary beginning. Genuine renewal starts with repentance, not emotional experience. Christ Himself warned that the narrow gate leads to life, while the broad road leads to destruction (Matthew 7:13-14, 21).
Those who fear the Lord most deeply will also experience the greatest measure of His blessing. The Spirit of sonship is poured out abundantly on those who fear the Father.
“God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of sonship. When we cry, “Abba! Father!” it is the Spirit himself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God.” – Romans 5:5, 8:14-16
The double-fisted gospel is a key not only for bringing men back to the Church, but for bringing men back to a vital relationship with God the Father. Lent invites us to make this very pilgrimage—a return marked by repentance, reverence, and renewed trust in the Father’s mercy. Men who embrace this path will not only become faithful Catholic Christians, but better fathers to their children and faithful grandfathers to generations yet to come.
Yours in His Majesty’s Service,
Steve Wood
P.S. If you know a husband, father, son, or brother who has drifted from the Church, I encourage you to share this article with him. Family Life Center exists to strengthen faith and family life by proclaiming the whole Gospel—God’s mercy and His call to holiness. If you find this work helpful and are able to support it, I am grateful.
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